Well obviously alot has happened. Where should I start? From the beginning I guess.

Ok well Nemmy spent the night Sunday and watched the kids for us on Christmas Eve Day. Both of us had to work and we had no other choice. Nemmy rocks. We took Nems with us to my Aunt Marys house for the family holiday. She was well received and all my cousins liked her a great deal. The spread was HUGE and we all ate well. We headed to Moms to do gifts there and then home. Christmas morning proved to be a delight. Santa made quite a stop at our house. Everyone had gifts to open. The kids fave? The motorized scooters from Mom and Dad! YAY! Logan got a VSmile and games and keyboard, Lauren got a gently used computer (from my Aunt Mary and Uncle John) and Shawn got some clothes and tools. Nemmy got a tart warmer and tarts and I got tools (LOL) and a light up make up mirror (DROOL). There’s more but why go into details? Everyone was happy and no one left the tree empty handed.

The kids went to my Moms Christmas night and have been there since. Shawn and I had to work seriously long hours this week and we just couldn’t afford a sitter. So Mom took the kids and I was able to put in big time rockin hours this week. I’m working today at 1 and we have Shawns company thing tonight. It’s a hockey game (YAY) and free goodies. Nuff said, we are all gonna enjoy that. I work tomorrow and will hit over 40 hrs this week so next week check will ROCK! Of course, with all thats happened lately, I’m barely working next week.

Barbs funeral is next Saturday. Her son David is throwing a MASSIVE celebration of her life. The country club is gonna be packed with folks and we are taking over and gonna just have a ball. The kids can’t go and are gonna have to crash with my mom again. She’s more then happy to help out as the kids just don’t need to go to another funeral. They went to Aunt Cathys a couple years ago and that was more stress then they could handle. Plus with Lauren, she will think of Dawn and I can’t put her through that.

So next week is hectic. Punker Paul is coming in Sunday night, Nemmy is headed up (to meet Punker Paul and hook up) and we are gonna party like its 1999 for 2 nights and play cards. We are making lots of good food, and gonna have some fun with 2 of our friends and basically ring in the New Year with some fun and laughter. We even got a bottle of bubbly and I got my good glasses ready.

My health hasn’t improved much. My knees are a wreck from the poured concrete floors at work. I got good shoes but those only help so much. I need to find a new orthopedic doctor and get my knees evaluated. I am seriously dreading this and putting it off for as long as possible but between Nemmy, Shawn and one other I’ll be lucky to not get my ass chewed for waiting this long. As a treat to us both, I took Shawn to the hot tub gardens to help us both unwind and relax. Nothing like 120degree hot water and bubbles to ease your aching body and let your mind wander. We both felt better but I could use another hour easily.

We are still amongst the clutter at the new house. I still see cardboard boxes as I scan the room but it’s slowly coming together. We bought the Closet Maid shelves and finished all the closets last night. I even have a shelf in my laundry alcove for storage. Once I feel confident in how my house looks, I will post pictures openly. So far, I’m frustrated with the clutter and mess and am waiting.

The kids are doing great and Lauren is excited because her dad is coming up for her birthday in a couple weeks. We are bowling (again) and keeping it small and simple. Just Logan, Caleb, Autumn and possibly my niece Abbi. If her dads bring his “things” boys thats on them, I’m not paying for that mess. I don’t like the fiancee nor her sons. They are little assholes. But the party will be fun though a dark cloud will be hanging over my head in silence.

Nemmy has to return to Germany. I am literally heartbroken. Due to a few circumstances beyond her control and that of her husband, she has to fly back on the 11th. I’ve cried a great deal since she confirmed it the other day. I can’t help but be “well what about me” but I know it’s not her fault or choice. She has to do this and I have to get over it. I am hoping to have a few great pictures from New Years of her and I to share and for me to have to capture the memories of her short stay in Michigan. I can’t say more on why she’s leaving or even how much it hurts. I’m still coming to terms with it and the reasons for her departure are solely because of the US Army.

Beyond all those things, life has been quiet but good. Shawn is working his ass off, I do the same. I’ve lost almost another whole size since working which is amazing considering how I eat at work. (I’m so bad) The kids are getting SOOO tall. Lauren is wearing 10s in jeans and shirts and Logan is between 5/6 and 7/8. He’s getting so big too fast. My children fascinate me lately. They are evolving into little people! So outspoken and well read. Lauren is approaching the pre teen years in a blaze of fury and God help me I’m terrified! LOL! She is definetly her mothers daughter. I fear for the world :) Logan on the other hand is a replica of his father thus far. He is loving, caring, attentive and easily distracted. Give the boy toys or tools and he’s in another world. Yep, Shawn’s son. Figures.

I’ll close for now. I have to shower and get ready for work. Shawn is driving me in today partly due to bad weather, partly due to my accident last night and partly due to the hockey game tonight. No need for 2 vehicles to be roaming the streets. 

Happy Holidays no matter how you celebrate it. 

Aunt Barb died early Christmas morning. She died at 2:30am. The last person she spoke to was my mother in law. With her last breath she told her how much she loved her.

Rest In Peace.

My deepest and most heartful holiday wishes go to the following people: (if you are forgotten it is NOT intentional)

 Halima

Jill

Linda

Gina

Sherry

Martha

Luna

Joe

Nemmy

Padme and Anakin

Kaya and Her Master

His Trazure

Master Dream and His Precious Treasure

but most of all

“Listen Here Wench” (said with pursed lips and a pointed finger) You know who you are. I don’t need to say more. You are loved and a treasured addition to my life. Nuff said.

I hope each of you and your families have a lovely holiday. Remember that nothing is forever. There is a beginning and an end to everything. What is here today could be gone tomorrow. Grudges and angst should be let go and forgotten. It’s time to renew and refresh. Instead, extend a hand, embrace someone that has wandered from the circle and most of all, love those nearest to you. They could be gone in the blink of an eye.

 All my love to each of you and yours this season. You are invaluable and cherished.

I’m more than just a little disgusted with myself. I promised a phone call to someone on Tuesday and since the storm the cable has been on the fritz and I never got a chance to make that call. My deepest apologies to you. It was beyond my control. I have net again and will FINALLY get around to making that call. I think Christmas will be the perfect time. :)

I’m working my ass off, literally. I’m still dropping weight and slimming down. I love my new figure but damn if I can keep my jeans on my ass. I need a belt. I still love my job and enjoy going in every day. But thank FUCK for days off.

I lost my voice due to being so sick the last few days. I sound like a damn mouse. I squeaked all night at work and was picked one all damn day by my co-workers. It’s nice to be loved.

Ok time to finish up on the closets and unwind for abit before going to be and starting all fucking over.

xoxo

So I’ve discovered just how sick I really am. I am a twisted thing. I really am. I read a few blog posts on a couple of different blogs and I couldn’t tear myself away from them. They were horrible, vile and god I was so turned on it was just.. wrong.

See, sick!

I am turning into this lil freaky slut and lordy the changes are just wild. I find myself drawn to the strangest things that just a year ago I would have gone running in the opposite direction, screaming and tearing my hair out. I live and breathe off a couple of blogs that do and say things I only wish I was experiencing.

*grumbles with jealousy*

Yes I’m letting my inner slut-slave creep out and damn it, I WANT MORE! I want more and need more and crave more! I want to do some of these things that I read other girls trying and living. I want to be under the hard firm rules and strong hand. I want the slight humilation and mild degradation. I want to try some micro managing. I want to be chained to a hook in the wall, settled on a cushion waiting for Him to allow me up. I want to have certain parts of my life monitored and checked on periodically. I like knowing that I don’t have absolute control over my own life. I have control but He has the veto.

Now, that having been said, I got the munchies. Since no one can order me about just yet and tell me what I can and can’t have, I think I’ll munch on some chips and drink some soda. HA!