I feel more alive and in tune with myself since I’ve been out of work. I’ve spent more time with the kids, with Shawn and with myself.

I finally started a new book, Laura Reese - Panic Snap. It’s supposed to have heavy BDSM themes. I love books of this nature. So far it’s quite good. I’ve had Christine Feehan recommended to me as well and will look for books of her “Dark Series” as well. I guess they also have heavy undertones of bdsm. I’ll be curious to see. I may even review the book here. God knows I’m a huge reader.

I’ve finally made some serious progress on my cross stitch. I’ll have to post a picture soon I suppose, for the few of you that care to see my work. I also made contact with By Jupiter whos charms appear in four patterns by M Designs that I am currently working on. I have one season of four done and need the charms for the other three. I hope to order those soon.

Shawn is working insane hours. He has been assigned to his own route and drives clear out the lake shore on a daily basis now. He’s up at 4am and not home till 5pm most days. I have the kids schedules to juggle now. Logan has football practice and Lauren has cheerleading. We have both on the same days (so far as I can tell) and then there’s game days on Saturday. We travel, which shocks me considering Logan is in Flag division and awfully young. But we will do what needs to be done.

Speaking of football, my mother paid for Logan’s fee for flag football. Yes I know, don’t all gasp at once. I was utterly floored by her offer. It stems from the whole conversation we had about her treating the kids equally and stop tossing my past into my face. We ended up in an hour long phonecall and getting the air clear. She’s making an effort and I’m leaving the door open for her to do it.

And clearing the air brings me to my next subject. I got a return email from my step mother. Dad wasn’t joking that they’ve become super spiritual. Now mind you, not holy rollers but in touch with God seems right. She wrote me, it was very pleasent and left the door wide open for her and I to re establish a healthy relationship. She’s willing and I’m willing so we will see what happens.

We are headed to Julie’s today for a cookout and swimming. It’s going to hit 90 here and well, what better way to cool off then to hit the pool. Shawn is going to assist TJ with some fencing that needs to be put up and the kids will hang out and I’ll yack with Julie for awhile. I will take my stitching with me just in case I get tremendously bored and it seems Mimi is going with. I’m going to take the camera and try to get some pics. I’ve taken very few this summer. Time to make up for that. I may even get into one myself.

Here’s hoping you all have a lovely long holiday weekend (for those in the US) and for everyone else,  just have a good time.

… or call it a toy review! Yep it’s been a few weeks since I’ve done one and this time I have a double!

So the other day my dear Shawn finally decided to it was time to get a little kinky. Now we all know how totally nilla he is, but this time he realized I NEED what I need and he was going to give it to me. It wasn’t much but for him it was a HUGE step.

In all honesty I wasn’t expecting it but then I found myself wrapped up in Japanese Restraint Kit. First off, the blindfold is worthless. I didn’t like it at all. Too stiff and the straps were just huge. That basically got tossed to the side and I’ll never use it again. But now the rope restraints are very nifty. Extremely soft to the touch, easy to use and down right comfortable. No this isn’t the clothes yard line outside kind of rope, its NIOCE. We looped it through the iron headboard and BAM instant restraint. With kids in the house, I like how quickly I can slide out of them on my own .. yanno.. JUST in case. But once in them I forgot I could and basically was captive to what ever he wanted to do.

Then just for giggles, he decided I need to be spanked and not just on my bottom. Oh no. He was thinking.. EVERYWHERE. The Leather and Fleece Paddle made its debut as well. Talk about kink overload for me. He is never this outgoing or anything but man he had game that day.

The Leather and Fleece Paddle is a top notch addition to my toy chest. I simply LOVE this item. It is durable, strong and yet small enough that it JUST fits into my toybox for hiding. The leather side gives a nice sting to flesh and fleece side does send a good jolt through the body but without the slap of leather.

Quite frankly I was surprised at how nicely the Leather and Fleece Paddle worked! It was just the right amount of slap and kiss. Shawn was very comfortable using it which was the other big bonus.

All in all, I love both the Japanese Restraint Kit and Leather and Fleece Paddle. They are wonderful toys that stick close to my bed. They have seen repeat preformances since their debuts in our bedroom.

Speaking of toys, I must have lost my report on the Flexi Felix! I could just slap myself for that. Sooooooooooooo expect a another Toy Review this week from me regarding the Flexi Felix.

As always, don’t forget to check out all the GREAT stuff at VibeReview. Great toys at fabulous prices. The coupon I mentioned previously STILL WORKS for a nice discount!

This post is going to be complicated. I have a few things to address and none of them are simple.

First I spoke with my mother yesterday. Yes I spoke with the Anti Christ. It started as the last few of our conversations (with me being closed off and pissy because its her calling) and ended up in our agreeing that she needs to start acting right and I’ll start giving her a chance to treat the kids right. Obviously I can’t and won’t revisit the entire conversation here but needless to say it was a good conversation and we are on trial basis to see if she can act like she is supposed to.

Then there is my personal struggle with a friend this week. I’ve been under some stress and a friend of mine is having some issues with real life lately. Unfortunately, there is little I can do but be a good friend and watch this person try to make sense of the 3 things that are causing them pain. I want to be there in the way I know they need me to be but they have to go through all this on their own. I have to just stand back and offer my hand if they stumble and my arms for an embrace if they need it.  Never mind, the person doesn’t need me at all. They proved that.

The drama from my former employer has calmed. I had a talk with someone regarding some of the “she said/she said” and straightened a few things out. Let me start by saying that supposedly copies of my blog (and myspace) were posted some place for public consumption, and supposedly if I didn’t stop being angry about the situation and posting about it, there was going to be charges pressed. Guess what? I can go on all I like. I’ve mentioned NO names of anyone and never once used the store name. I have done nothing wrong and if the person that is complaining (and crying from what I’ve heard) doesn’t like my posting about it then quite frankly, stop reading it. No one forces you to read it or come here. (My Myspace has since been set to private so that has curtailed the problem there) Get over it chica. I can say what I like and there’s little you can do about it.

Not working has left me with time to get my house in order. I am slowly organizing things in a better and neater fashion. With Lauren being home, I have some help with it all. I’ve missed her a bunch and glad to see she enjoyed herself but I’m glad she’s back. I don’t like sending her away for even a short time. She belongs here with me.

She came home with a huge bag full of clothes and we’ve washed and folded them all. Now we just need to hang them up and have her go through all the jeans in her dresser to see what fits. Everything that both kids have outgrown will go to my church in Kalamazoo and get donated to the reservation.

Now I gotta get my ass in gear. I have to get the kitchen tidy again, get the last of the laundry done and go tackle cleaning out my car. I have a doctors appointment to move (I double booked myself on Monday) and I have to get my bloody brace on. I’ve been diagnosed with carpal tunnel on Tuesday. Lovely. So I have this huge brace to wear that goes to my freakin elbow (almost) and I scheduled my follow up for Monday but I have court Monday to clear up the mess about child support for my oldest.

UGH! Too much to do and not enough time to do it.

Due to a major crybaby, I will just have to protect certain posts now. So if you see something passworded, leave a comment and I’ll share. At least now I can really call it as I see it and no one is the wiser.

Grow up honey, it ain’t always about you. You’re not that damn special.

Happy now??